With the tunes of Staind and Hoobastank

I am experiencing this awakening. It feels like a falling out. Drifting into the unknowns yet again but not quite the same. It's not just about being in black or white or even of the grey matter. It's not only about intoxication or mild inebriation. It's definitely not about being hyper religious. I was surprised that how easily snapped I became when there was once I thought 'could be' seems impossible when I was indulged. Embarassed of moi but I shall keep it to myself. But deep down, I still think that is not possible. I'm confusing myself, again, I know. Callous and hardened like the shell of an egg. I wonder what's the inside like. I don't know. A full boiled or raw for that instance. The sense of gloomy darkness and euphoria of passion that gave so much into the matters of the heart, hopes and dreams suddenly vanished. Could it be not vanished, then faded or confused or kept might have taken place. It shall arise once again like a scintilla. To fuel the desire of a meaningful connection. The blend so beautiful that invokes shedding of tears and ever flowing energy that ignite frolic and jovial expression is still very much needed.