Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Messenger Vs Messenger

ICQ v4.1 suck cock shit. I clicked yes to allow the auto upgrade process of my ICQ Lite and how regretful I am now. I feel like I'm using an Ah Beng's version of ICQ which is horrendously cluttered with so-called decorations popping out at the most undesirable locations and corners. Bah! They had even taken away the classic skin option which could have at least provided me with the simple dull grey look.

I sort of boycotted my once favourite yahoo! messenger also because of the latest ominous upgrade. Now when it's on, my Pentium 4 PC sometimes remain dormant and somehow becomes foobar that seems to suddenly aged a few years older, even older than a Pentium I 100 MHz, becomes totally non responsive even being lambasted with tons of profanities and it pisses me off, nuff said.

So what's with this competition of providing avatar /picture / radio / games / webcam / sms / doodoo / emoticons / audicons / animaticons /whatever lah. I would be glad if only they allow us to customise and select the features or functionalities of their messenger masterpiece.

Tuesday, June 29, 2004


I don't think I felt decrepit. But I currently have this feeling that I'm transforming into a sloth. A cynical one that is. On the other hand, it's not like I'm being all creative and making accurate pin-point diversions or de-tour. Shirking just ain't my habit, ya know? I used to have this tag as my signature that goes like "If you are not standing on the edge, you are simply taking too much space". Come to think of it again, it's damn quirky.

I think it could be just due to how events unfold themselves lately. Now if only I know when to cherish and make use of such peaceful moments. Additional recruitments will help increase the chances of such moments unless that is, if they steal my moment.

murphy law applies to garage

I wasted approximately four hundred bucks in a Murphy law's fashion. I gained nothing that is visible to me, nothing that I would call tangible except some obscured gratification which is maintaining ventilation to keep me alive in the vehicle, replacing a button that will wear and tear after a number of presses and I wouldn't call that hordes unless I'm lucky and finally to fix the opening which prevents my car being soaked, enables it to be locked and also to avoid rendering myself to master the basic skills of a taxi driver.


Monday, June 28, 2004

partial desk

This is my desk in my office. Felt abit "mou liu", so I documented the view with my phone.

Nothing much to describe really. There stood my watch (I always take off my watch when I'm at my cubicle), a kilometrico pen with the tip cover lost, a smart card reader, one orange mcdonalds happy-not-happy ping pong ball, my organizer for random scribbles, a copy of The Sun shitty newspaper, far left is one packet of betik something (I do not touch it, yucky yuck, that's for my mom), some chocolates, a printout snoopy calendar and two white mugs.

mou liu = (in cantonese) erm...erm...would somebody help me to translate? mucho gracias

banner de la me

Look Ma, no banners!

Thanks to Ben for the tips. Appreciate it greatly. However, now I officially cannot claim of possessing knowledge in the domain of web development. Although I managed to apply the trick onto the template, I still can't figure out logically why in the blue hell it works. Ben said that it's magik. Well let it be so then. In other words, I'm not so geeky. Being not geek is not cool.

Hehehe. Look again, no banners. hahaha.

*shows victory sign*

Saturday, June 26, 2004

crash helmet

Girls who tie their hair in a topi-keledar fashion is fucking funny!

Friday, June 25, 2004

Green robot who always lose

I found this link from dSaint's blog. I used to have that toy action figure. He is a character from the cartoon Silverhawks. After more than a decade, I finally know that dude's original name which is Buzzsaw and his sidekick bird shredator. I used to call him the green robot, razor guy and orange bird. Buzzsaw was always cast as the villain or the henchman of the villain boss. My favourite villain was the muscular Bee dude. I think he's from He-Man. That Bee dude looks mean so he is always the big boss. kakaka.

Went all the way,
forty to fifty kilometres,
ride steel jongget-jongget,
no tyre and dent on the ground,
place called ponggong in bangsar,
others were drinking beer,
laughing out loud hysterically,
park has sign of no alcohol,
rich man were partying with bright lights,
we were waiting in waja,
with headlights off like CID,
patrolling multi million properties.

assume makes an ass out of yourself,
that is why I said communicate more,
but you said no need no need,
the facts got jumbled,
and you got embarassed,
still wanna keep the ego,
and bark with no mercy,
I felt pity but I can't say anything,
I guess apologising is needed,
but for sure you will evade,
for how the matter is resolved,
is in your own hands and mouth.

I kinda feel like this fella now.

*Yawn*. I knew my alarm rang at 2:30 AM, but I said fuck it, switched it off and went back to slumberland.

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

My mum's fury and my destiny

Hell hath no fury like my mother's fury.

That really sums it all yesterday night when my mum ran amok and started her yelling in a sudden outburst. It sparked when she needed to send my brother to his tuition class which starts at half past eight and it is already half past eight.

My mum was furious to the fact that my brothers dedicate their lives and a major portion of hours to live and serve in a fantasy world, the Ragnarok. Damn RO, the rate is more taxing than mobile phone topup cards and perhaps it beats marijuana and even cigarettes anytime in terms of addictiveness. You see, can you smoke 18 hours non-stop without a break? That's my point.

So all in all, I was asked to remove the ADSL modem and there goes my Streamyx connection because my brothers' room house my router and ADSL modem. All I needed was just a LAN cable which connects to the router.

I was bewildered yet amused when I was shown with somekind of an almanac or should I say the-buku-latihan-which-has-my-life-story-written-in-4-pages.

I couldn't read chinese / mandarin, so my mum read it and she said she has kept that book for 20 years. Some of the interesting highlights that amused me or at least baffled me.

- I came to this world carrying 2 sack of clothes, 80 tons of fish and meat, 10 sack of rice.
[I have no bloody idea what that is supposed to dictate]

- 16 to 20 years of age, I will have problems.
[If I try hard to relate to that, then I would say I had 3 huge skin problems during that period. I can only remember the name of one, which is Eczema and that was bad]

- 21 to 30 years of age, I will have "tou fa wan" problems.
[Erm. Really? Haha]

- My wife and children will suffer when I reach mid life because in my past life I had served meat and wine to monks.
[So this is suppose to be some Karma shit? I was wicked!! Haha. Well at least I gave those monks a good treat.]

- I will be rich but I cannot live in a bungalow.
[That ain't fair man!]

- 51 - 55 years of age. I will have "siu yan".
[Erm. no comment yet but I'm gonna kill him/her]

- 56 - 60 years of age, I will have "tou fa wan" problems again.
[Hahaha. Who's the player now?]

- My life is water life. Sea Water Life.
[What the fuck?]

Conclusion, that is my life's destiny written when I was about 2-3 years old and my mum paid RM 2 to that divine old man from Tampin.

p.s - It says that my brother will be freaking rich in life but he will end up being cheated by his wife and children. Muahahahaha he got sabo'd.

buku latihan = exercise book
streamyx = slowass ADSL connection provided by TM Nut
tou fa wan = Relationship dilemma (cantonese)
siu yan = Enemy? (cantonese)

Monday, June 21, 2004

Say Bon Jour to me

Got the idea from Michael Ooi and HanYi.

Welcome to my blog. De Rien. I also would like to reach out (*waves hand*) and know those who read my blog. Hopefully some of you will leave a comment about your nick/name, contact, homepage, location, etc.


What matters

Nothing really counts.
Be it superficial or not.
At the end of the day,
when you lay your head on the pillow,
there is this person who comes to mind.
That's what really matters.

Saturday, June 19, 2004

When CO beats O2

I was drenched in my own sweat while driving back home. My car's aircond system has decided to throw a tantrum and annoy me. The stuffy condition and massive inhaling of carbon monoxide have nearly taken my life away and I would have just died in the middle of a traffic jam. But with my perseverence, I managed to return home safely in a depressing state not to mention my lack-of-oxygen state.

It was magnified with my bad mood for not being able to have my "bak kut teh" for lunch when the weather was ok. You see, everyday is scrotching hot and this particular kopitiam which has my "bak kut teh" is a very special kopitiam indeed. I don't know why but that shop somehow managed to collect and accumulate heat to create a magnificent ambience for their patrons. Maybe it's to provide warmth. *shrugs*.

Something I noticed this morning, my youngest brother's three naughty red swordstail fishes have been isolated into a special dungeon where they serve their detention there. kekeke. They were too obnoxious and bullied the other much larger and useless goldfishes by impaling their body with their puny head. Now that they are relocated in the dungeon, they seem to be sad and prefered to express themselves by remaining stagnant. They now look more stoned than the ultra-stoned fishes (fung fei chau) which you can see in most chinese restaurants as described by bear.

Bear brought up one excellent comment yesterday by describing students of hospitality management as paying-to-learn-to-be-a-maid. Breaks into guffaws.

Au Revoir.

Thursday, June 17, 2004

Today I am a typist

I've been pouding on the keyboard all day while having exhorbitant amount of Alt + Tab and the alignment of my sight to the progress to accompany me. While my fingers are doing the job in auto-mode, I didn't quite get to utter any word with the exception of a few "diu / fuck / shit / damn / zhk" when I hit the wrong key or screwed up the style and format or when I didn't save frequently enough to greet the "Do not send this Error Report" button with beaming confidence.

I had a look at eBay this afternoon. Gmail invitation sells at 0.01 USD and with the selling fees the seller needs to pay eBay, they are actually making loses for themselves. I wonder how sales of Gmail invitations at USD 79.99 compete with USD 0.01. And yeah, there are people who bid for that 79.99 version. Looks like that seventy nine ninety nine dude is winning.

Wednesday, June 16, 2004


I'm drowning. I do not have much strength left. I'm running out of breathe. When will this drowning be over?

I'm mired in misery. I'm trying hard to chase the goth out of me. Somber reflections be damned.

I want to reach the surface and see the sky again.

Sunday, June 13, 2004

Pro Wrestling

While browsing some old pics in my pc, I saw a folder containing photos which are more violence prone. As you can see, I was the victim at the receiving end of a mighty chokeslam and devastating Tombstone Piledriver. Both signature moves of The Undertaker. Not to forget, I myself gave him exact instructions on how to perform those moves. There are many more complicating ones such as the pump handle slam. Due to our size difference and gemuk's inflexibility, unacrobatic physique and his speed disadvantage; we only managed to torture each other with a limited set of moves. His particularly resembles The Undertaker, Big Show and Brock Lesnar's repetoire.

It was painful - to be more precise, it's more like experiencing

1) all air taken out of you
2) screaming when tied up in an unbelievable submission move (super boston crab)
3) head slowly gathering composure and balance

, exhausting yet fun. Those picture were taken about 3 years ago. Now I have gained about 5-6 KG while gemuk leading me far with 20 KG. He was 85+ KG then. Now? You do the math.

Friday, June 11, 2004

Rocking stays idle

I begin to appreciate the enjoyment of idle time brings upon. Idle time wouldn't be so enjoyable if one hasn't been through the day with work in abundance. The feeling is like the great boulder is taken off your shoulder. I wouldn't however identify this as shirking. When can I retire and enjoy myself relaxing at the sandy beach while sipping cocktail and listen to the tunes of country music. Sometimes, it's not really the rife amount of work but rather that such monkey jobs involves ceaseless trial and error attempts and making absolutely dumb executions to get the expected results. Speaking of that, I realised one fine day that cluttering extra two funky text files on the desktop would actually allow the program to carry on without complaining. Does that seem logical to you? It must be but I don't bother. At times, we don't really bother the why and how of these things work. As long as it still works then that's fine. Just as similar to how we often take many other things for granted.

I'm having thoughts to myself again. As usual it's between being callous and pissed and confused. Damn it, I hope the between word caters for three items. Currently feeling mellow accompanied by the gloomy music that Staind has to offer. Ocassionally with John Mayer, Norah Jones, Live, Linkin Park, Matchbox Twenty and others intercepting with their interpretation of melancholic moody songs depending on who wins in the queue of streaming downloads.

The line above is written approximately 4 hours ago. And as always, a man is happier when he is fed. I've got no complains now. I'm looking at the time at my desktop. The time now is 3:36 PM. It's Friday, the day everybody looks forward to. I will allow the kickass rock songs to stir my mood and keep me sane until the clock finally decides to show 5:30 PM. And then I will allow the rock bands to rest. :). Au Revoir.

Thursday, June 10, 2004

Poetry I shit you not.

It is when you have idle time,
of quantity which you call excess,
not having to do anything,
not wanting to do anything,
your mind wanders aimlessly,
floating and bouncing around,
in random direction,
with no determination,
feeling incomplete,
lost and unaccomplished.

Perhaps uncertainty,
is always a part of life,
life is a journey,
it is up to oneself,
to decide and act upon,
to cater one's needs and desire,
and to provide for others,
no matter what is written,
or carved in hopeful believes,
that is known as,
fate and destiny.

As you can see, I have too much free time I suppose. I felt shallow and uneducated. Sort of like having a "BTC" degree. Haha. I can't bloody write poetry / poems probably due to the lack of me reading books / novels. I don't think I'm even qualified to use the word "lack". It's more like "never" and that would be more appropriate. It is never unless you count Oliver Twist and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory which will provide me with a count of 2. Yeah, there you have it. I'm so pathetic. Haha. I'm now trying hard to muster my strength and gather enough courage just to click the orange "Publish Post" button and subject myself to embarassment. Well... there's always the "Delete" button. Ahaks.

BTC = Boh Tak Chik <-- (hokkien) I think it means No Study

Sunday, June 06, 2004

Growing up

I met some old friends or shall I say ex-schoolmates yesterday night. Some of whom I did not see for about approximately 5 years.

At first, my brain tries to decipher the physical attributes and mentally match them with the profiles that is stored in my memory about the person. I don't know why is it that but somehow everyone seems to be gaining weight.

I was struck in awe. Well not quite, but at least I'm quite surprised that night to say the least. This dude used to be a super menacing "phai khia" / jackass / bastard / samseng. He used to do various creative and dumb stuffs where he ended up being beaten up by hundreds of punches and some crash helmet shots. He used to challenge whatever rule there is. There are quite a number of smart extortions that he did in which could left him in the "lokap" or even the prison but I'm not going into the details. I'm still not sure whether he has extra guts or less intelligence at that time.

Anyway, he is now an ex-cafe owner cum college student. He used to be the boss of a cafe at Pusat Bandar Damansara. He closed it after a few years and decided to pursue his studies instead. So his current collegemates would be very much younger and I asked him whether he could mix and blend in with them. He gave me a very definite answer. He explained that the topics that the youngsters talk about ranged from LAN games to how they negotiated a corner on the road while making their tyres scream. So it's obvious that this is a been-there-done-that case. I understood exactly why he couldn't blend in now.

The second dude was a jackass too. However, he specializes more into vandalism, inflicting pain onto individuals who are known as "teachers", perform daredevil stunts...come to think of it, he's one crazy maniac. He is now working in Celcom doing Customer Service. One could not imagine how in the hell he would end up with that job. Isn't it ironic considering his personality with his job responsibility? Well he said that he is good now and he is honest with his job.

It just felt weird albeit nice. The thing about "grown up" and how it relates with the word "eventually".

Wednesday, June 02, 2004

my piano

Look at my piano. Look at what my mom did to it?